I’m coming back: a conversation that returns women’s resistance

We have launched a new project for women who have lost their homes, work and the hardest faith in themselves due to the war. It’s called ‘I’m coming back’ and his idea sounds in one of the first phrases of our video release: ‘The project is not about pity or one-time help. We want to bring women back to life so that they can feel resistance again, restore their strength and faith. ‘

In the new issue of the video project ‘What it’s like to be a woman’ the founder of ‘Ukrainian Valkyrie’ Daryna Trebukh and co-host Iryna Kryzhevska openly talk about what is usually silent about: exhaustion, fear, loss of status and about As women displaced persons return to their.

Watch the issue: “I’m coming back | Time to recover | Circle of Support” (Issue 15).

War BThere are not only houses – she wouldThere is a psyche

The first thing the presenters say is the invisible price of endurance. When a person loses everything, anxiety comes first, followed by more severe states. “When you lose everything, the first thing withIt turns out that it is an increased level of anxiety, which is further accompanied by depression This is apathy, it is exhaustion, it is burnout, it is a refusal of further quality life.

And all this against the background of the everyday horror of war: “Every woman is going through it now against the background of night events, when you just rush in bed constantly from explosions. Some people go down to the shelter, and some simply have nowhere to go. ‘

The main idea: psychological recovery is a basic need. Sometimes you can’t handle it without a specialist.

Not only housing is lost. Social status is lost

Moving takes more than an apartment. He takes away the usual circle, friends, role in society. ‘They have lost not only their homes, their city, they lose their social status It really needs a person.’

The presenters share their own experience in 2022 – Truskavets, Chernivtsi, Belgium and remember the little things that hide great pain. The experience of resettlement is the experience of losing identity, not just property. And we need to talk about it out loud.

Life and bureaucracy are being killed where there are almost no powers

‘The first thing you are faced with is household issues The queue for pasta, CNAPs, thresholds are beaten by people, certificates, status and it all is pouring. And the psyche simply refuses. ‘

The presenters also speak openly about financial injustice: “People with a disability are 3,000, and everyone else has UAH 2,000. People are good, can this money survive at all? You will not rent an apartment, not even a room. ‘

State support for IDPs still does not cover basic needs and this gap cannot be silent.

Depreciation of the profession – a separate injury

Women who have business or management positions start from scratch abroad: “Your higher education diploma is of no interest to anyone And our women go to work in cleaning, delivery, dry cleaning. If you were a doctor, the maximum that you can count on in Europe is to be an assistant. ‘

The presenters especially single out the wives of the wounded soldiers: ‘I have many migrant women who actually live in the hospital, caring for a seriously wounded man I can’t watch without tears.’

Stigma both abroad and at home

‘Abroad, we are still treated as refugees, you will never be your own there. Unfortunately, the same problem exists in Ukraine as well – it’s bullying from Ukrainians themselves: ‘had’, ‘we do not surrender to migrants’. Children face problems at school. ‘ Immigrants need not only services, but also safe space without condemnation.

A woman’s circle that truly treats

The cross-cutting idea of the whole conversation is the power of the community. A simple phrase can do what no instruction will do: ‘It would be very cool to gather these women in one circle, when just the phrase’ I understand you, because I’m the same ‘it really helps. These women even have something to keep quiet about. ‘ ‘Only a woman will help the woman she really understands, who is going through the same problem.’ Women’s mutual support is the core of permanence.

Recovery only works in the complex

The presenters emphasize that this is not the work of one training. ‘It’s not the work of one day or one training – these are physical practices, art therapy, affirmations, work with a psychologist, yoga, retreat, meditation, sports, even just walks.’ And the main barJER inside: ‘Often he stops despair of himself, the devaluation of himself:’ I can do nothing, I will disgrace. ‘ A woman does not perceive herself as a woman, but simply as a service for a child. ‘

What makes ‘I’m coming back’

The project is implemented in partnership with the NGO ‘Ukrainian Valkyrie’ and the Charitable Foundation ‘Draman’. The roles are clear: ‘Ukrainian Valkyrie’ is a generator of the project: gathers women, reveals their real needs, provides support and legal support. Charitable Foundation ‘Draman’ – art therapy, acting training, emotional healing of soul and body.

‘We are a generator of everything: we gather people, identify the real needs of women, provide support and legal support. And then ‘Draman’ – art therapy, acting training ‘Draman’ – it’s more about creativity, and ‘Valkyrie’ more about legal support of women.

The program of psychological support with a professional specialist for women will start soon.

‘Our project’ I’m returning ‘wants to return a woman to a woman’s resource so that she can remember that she is not only a mother, guardian or wife, but first of all – a person. If you are filled with energy, you will be able to give it to your loved ones. ‘

And a phrase with which you can summarize the whole project: ‘The way will overcome who is going. start going and the road withwill appear. ‘

Join

If you are an IDP woman who feels confused and does not know where to turn, you are not alone.

Write to us on social networks or at Ukrainian Valkyrie page.

Leave a comment under the issue – Tell us which practices would be valuable to you.

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We want IDP women not to be left alone with their pain. For every woman deserves support and to return to her.